MM Retro Review: Chocolate

14886217_1040838869357950_851251975_nBy Rob Stoakes. So there aren’t any films out as of time of writing. No superhero movies, no sequels, no big launches for multi-film franchises, and you know what that means. Yes, it’s time to make up a flimsy excuse to talk about a film that’s more than a few weeks old. This is an action film, and there are action films out right now…

… sure, that will do.

It’s more than probable that you’ve not even heard of today’s retro review subject, Chocolate. It’s main claim to fame is that it was directed by the same guy who directed Ong Bak, and that’s the level of obscurity we’re talking about. This is a crime, however, because Chocolate has the distinction of possibly the most tasteful portrayal of autism in movies… and also the least tasteful. Continue reading

MM Retro Review: The Lion King

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By Rob Stoakes

In the first Movie Metropolis Retro Review, contributor Rob Stoakes looks back at a film that touched hearts across the globe. But what does he make of The Lion King 24 years after its initial release?

What happened to the summer blockbuster?

Is everyone seriously just waiting for September now? I look at the Odeon showings and I see a re-release of the Jungle Book and a subtitled Polish film that doesn’t even have the decency to be a perverse and morally degenerate horror film. Just some perverse and morally degenerate rom-com. It’s getting to the point where I’m actually looking forward to the Ghostbusters movie. At least it’ll be A film coming out. That’s like looking forward to eating live roaches because the McDonalds fryers aren’t working. Continue reading