Ouija: Origin of Evil review: by Rob Stoakes
UK Certification: 15
Halloween is over, everyone, and has been for over a week as of time of writing. But now seems to be when the horror movies start to crawl out of the ground. Because of course. And since we live in a world where even xXx is getting a sequel or reboot (seriously, xXx? Really?!) almost all of them are continuations of stories that did not need continuing.
Blair Witch exists thanks to this environment, and there’s that weird sequel to The Ring that’s on the horizon, but while those two were self-contained stories that didn’t need bolting onto, Ouija didn’t need continuing because it sucked like a Dyson Black Hole. Yet another uninspired, paint-by-numbers ghost story with all of the blood and monsters and psychological trauma (you know, things that HORRIFY people) replaced with jump scares. Continue reading
By Rob Stoakes
There is a TV show that is well known across the pond in ‘murkha and not very well known here called Mystery Science Theatre 3000, where comedians watch terrible public domain films. It’s sort of like wrestling; most of it sounds rubbish but is actually great. Anyway, it was during the watching of Midnight Special where I thought of one of their more famous quotes; “We hope you’ve enjoyed no moral theatre, ladies and gentlemen!”
So, the plot of Midnight Special is that this child with no personality really needs to get to this place (we’re never told exactly where) and something will happen, and if he doesn’t then… umm… well, the film forgets to say. And it never gets around to saying how the boy knows he needs to get where he needs to get to, or why the FBI want to stop him, or why this Christian cult want to stop him, or why the people who help him and his family get him to this place want to help him. Continue reading