Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders review: by Rob Stoakes
UK Certification: PG
So some of you may have noticed that I talk about Batman, like, a whole bunch. Meet me in person and you will probably not meet me in person because I’ll be hidden from you. Like Batman.
An orphan who trains in the martial arts to fight crime? Awesome. And the criminals are dark reflections of himself? Awesome. And it’s full of violence and sex and deep philosophical questions about justice and identity? Awesome. And there are stories where Batman is suddenly turned into a tiger or where Robin attacks The Beatles or where alien plants attempt to teach humans love through having incestuous tentacle sex with each other then suddenly dying to the bewilderment of all involved? Continue reading
By Rob Stoakes
Another day, another superhero film. X-Men Apocalypse has prompted many things that come around with a superhero film. Fans showing how little shame they have and dressing up in tight spandex to hang around at conventions to generate sweat, tons of fan-art of Quicksilver making out with Loki, and of course, movie critics insisting that superhero films are about to die any second, no seriously it’s about to happen.
Look, I get it. Variety is the spice of life, and you don’t want to be stuck with all of this nerd stuff. I totally understand. I’d personally hate it if there were a ton of films about fashion and human social interactions and other things I detest. You all want to go back to a time when Midnight Cowboy could be considered the biggest film release of the year so in denial you blindly insist that this whole superhero thing is just a passing phase that’s bound to end soon.
Well, you’re all right. One day, the superhero genre will die, and I know that it will because… Continue reading